Already in Our Hearts, Someday in Our Arms: September 2014

We've been busy starting school and trying to get into a routine during our days. Truly, Sima and Vaida's school for this year is Family 101---learning so much about trusting and feeling safe.

Our first day of school we have always had a treasure hunt for the kids' backpacks with clues and surprises in the backpacks. I never thought it would be tradition that the kids would look forward to--but they do so each year I try to stump them with clues and have some fun surprises.

Another day we went for a nature color walk (with backpacks!)--

And some painting after reading Mouse Paint to Sima and Vaida-

We are starting to get into a groove with school. It is fun to see how the girls are liking different things and great to see them continue to grow and change before our eyes.

This week was an interesting one. The day after I posted my last post was one of the most challenging ones I've had since we got home. We can see the girls attaching more and more and with that, testing us in ways. And Wednesday was a day full of struggles for one of our treasures.

We knew from our reading and preparation before we adopted that living in an orphanage can result in certain behaviors--but to see them acted out is very different from reading a book. And seeing actors on a video act out how to correct can be very different than "doing it" in real life:) Let's just say the lines don't always go as planned!

Bill and I discuss things that come up, turn to friends and family for prayer, and spend time praying over our current approach and if we should change it. On Thursday we decided to try a new approach with one issue that has become a real stumbling block in our house. And we have seen changes happening--praise God! Not at all the way we had planned it but so thankful to see some progress.

Saturday morning I was in the midst of a struggle over bubble gum and eating toast with one of our girls and could see things escalating quickly. The volcano was close to erupting! And in walks Jenny on her way to work. She asked what was going on and said to her sister in a very matter-of-fact way, "What are you doing? Just eat your toast. Mom is letting you have a piece of gum after--why would you be so silly about eating your toast first?"

Her sister bounced out of the chair, grabbed her toast, ate it and smiled. Then she proceeded to chat with Jenny before she left (while enjoying her bubble gum). I was sitting with my jaw on my lap trying to process what had just happened. I had been trying for almost twenty minutes to diffuse the situation through playful engagement and even a compromise--and Jenny eliminated the problem within a minute (I had prayed earlier when things were ramping up). The power of an older sister--what an answer to prayer!

Such a blessing to have so many different personalities in this place we call home. As our precious Sima and Vaida begin to grasp what a family is and how people in a family interact, love, forgive, share, play, cheer each other on, and comfort each other, I am thrilled to see how God has prepared each of us for this journey. I am filled with a sense of peace seeing our teenagers interact and seeing their tenderness and playfulness. My heart rejoices seeing their realization of the true worth of their new sisters---discussions of what their lives were like and would have been like if they weren't adopted and our hopes and dreams for them. Giggles and laughs over cute things the girls say or do (we all love to hear Vaida humming when eating food she likes and truly get a kick out of Sima's dancing and singing--she is learning more and more English through song!)

And to see how each day the younger four grow closer and closer. How they are becoming not only siblings but friends. To hear prayers from Nate and Ellie for their younger sisters, thanking Him for their new sisters. And to hear sweet Sima pray too---we can understand the "Dear God" and "Amen" and "chocolate", "ice cream", "coffee":)--says that for Mom's sake, "gum", "banana" and "apple"--our girl likes sweets!

A year ago when we told people that we were adopting, we had some question us about our other children. I think every family has to look at their own situations, their children and their needs, and spend time in prayer to see if adoption is right for them--and the time is right. I had written up a post last fall called something like "what about your other kids?" but decided not to post. I know some may feel that adding two more children, especially children who will need time and attention to learn things, may not be the best for a family. Bill and I felt adoption was the right decision for our family, all of our family. We have all had to stretch ourselves at times and put what we would like to do aside--something that will prepare our children for "real life" with a spouse and family.

We are so thankful that our children are able to try to empathize with Sima and Vaida as they adjust to a new life, everything in their lives having changed. We are thankful for an opportunity to help them learn compassion and service, two things that truly only grow through action. One can read all kinds of books to your children about compassion and service and talk until you are blue in the face but doing is learning. We are very thankful for all of our kids' support with our decision.

Thanking God today for every person He has in this family and what each ones bring to the beautiful tapestry called family. And how He can answer prayer through a big sister's words!